Better Medicine

This is what I needed, more than prescriptions.

 I was so upset on Tuesday, because my jaw was still aching, so I was going into day 2 of an essentially all-liquids diet, and I couldn't take 2 of the 3 drugs the doc prescribed me because they would make me too woozy at work, and I couldn't breastfeed with any of them, so I was feeling like a sham of a mother and a wimp of a person because apparently one way I process stress is clenching my jaw to the point of injury.

But then-

I went to the dentist, with no insurance because there was apparently some paperwork hold-up, terrified that he was going to say: headgear and retainer or crazy torturous piece of mouth machinery, but actually he said: warm compress, maybe a bite plate at night if it persists, but mostly just try to deal with whatever is causing you stress.

And so I decided to stop taking the meds so I could breastfeed again, talked with Stefin, stretched,  got an amazing night's rest, fed and cuddled with Aeli, and felt SO MUCH BETTER in the morning.

And then last night the event I helped organize for students to go see The Bully Project went wonderfully, and I came home around ten, to a beautiful and calm house and amazing partner, feeling jazzed and accomplished.  Today my jaw feels even better. 

Plan: girls movie tonight, yoga tomorrow, and maybe a workshop about raising chickens??? ... organizing my closet and reading for fun.

Fall has finally arrived in New Orleans, and I'm excited.

Do Not Breastfeed While Taking This Medicine

This makes me so sad.

I'm having to pump-and-dump right now since I'm taking meds for a TMJ disorder that revved up its intensity this weekend.

Typically, if there was a medication that interfered with breastfeeding, I just wouldn't take it, but this jaw weirdness got all of a sudden really bad- like it hurts a lot just to chew.
So, I'm eating oatmeal, soup, and smoothies, and Aeli's eating formula.

It kills me a little bit though.  First and foremost because, he tries to snuggle up and is cry/whine/rooting trying to get milk from me, the person he can always count on at least for that- and I can't give it to him.  I wonder if that's how it's felt for Stefin every time he was holding A when he was really hungry.  I guess it's probably the first of many many times where I'll feel frustrated that I can't provide everything our child wants/needs.

And of course, he's getting what he needs.  Stefin gave him a formula bottle in the middle of the night, which I know so many other families have done for a much longer time.  He'll be fine, and I'll be fine too.  It's only been 2-3 feedings, but I already miss those snuggly moments when he'd be nursing, and kind of gently scratching my side where his hand rested.

But stressing about that will not help this crazy jaw situation (Sunday night I told Stefin it felt like I had a chopstick lodged between my ear and the back corner of my jaw, and when I chewed it was like that area was filled with marbles or Scrabble pieces).  Stress was probably what made it so much worse.  So I'm stretching more and drinking tea instead of coffee and trying not to clench like I do sometimes at Aeli (a habit I think to avoid acting too much like Elmira from Looney Tunes).

So, that's a big nuisance in my lovely little life right now, that compounded with last minute schedule changes, made for a pretty overwhelming day yesterday.

This, however, cracks me up:


It's just like that page in "I'll Love You Forever."

And I will.  And he will be loved thoroughly whether he's drinking formula or breastmilk.
And hopefully this isn't the end of breastfeeding, just a handful-of-days hiatus...

Man, remember those days when I said "Ouch!" every time he latched on?
So much has grown and changed.

Also:

The Latest Games

Aeli has been very busy.

While I am washing dishes, or putting something away in the kitchen, or trying to find something to quickly cram some calories into my ever-hungry belly, he is usually pulling out pots and pans, and sliding them around on the floor kind of like the way they do the ab-roller on those infomercials.  It's all very noisy, but I do like the fact that he typically stays in the room with me, often evening setting up camp directly behind my heels.  I just have to be careful to always look down before I take a step.

Yesterday he scuttled away as I was scrubbing, and I gave him about 35 seconds before I abandoned my post to retrieve him, because I figure it takes him 30 to get to the forbidden bathroom, and it would probably take him more than 5 to get a handful of litter or cat-food into his mouth. 

For real, you actually start thinking like this.

When I did go to get him though, he wasn't in the forbidden bathroom at all.  He was just checking out the scene on the desk.

 He uses his tip-toes a lot.

And then he falls down.

Whoa! What just happened?

 Fortunately, unlike his mother, he doesn't cry too easily. 

Whining though?  That's another story. 

Presently, he is thoroughly entertained chasing a can of peaches around the living room.

Also:


I love this boy.

Weekend Snapshots

Canoes are quite good for drumming.


October in New Orleans is very good for swimming.
(The plug to the inflatable walls was amiss, so Grandpa made a temporary one with a wine cork and some duct tape.)
Mom and Grandma started on the wine in the mid-afternoon, while Grandpa, Papa, and The Astronaut (Josh) worked on constructing the arbor where vows will be exchanged this spring.
 
This place is very fun for exploring.

A Columbus Day Miracle!

 
A major catastrophe was narrowly averted today when Aeli and I engaged in a second walk-toward-the-Bywater.  The second walk was a mission to find the super-special-sucky that is the only one Aeli really likes, and apparently has been discontinued.  Rifling through these internet pages was making me feel like I was in the back section of some sleazy store, so I was Very Excited when we found the elusive pacifier on the sidewalk in between Frenchmen and Elysian Fields.

More on AACP's latest exploits later.

A Few Snapshots from the Weekend

 

Love Means...

Realizing that strange claw-less creature is much slower and less nimble than you, and seems to be sticking around, so you may as well try to make friends, sometimes.

Cleaning the pee and poop of everything at seven in the morning.

Agreeing to drop by your husband's place of work to bring him the red socks he says he needs by the end of the day (you don't know why; you just trust it's important).

Rocking a small creature who's a little bit ill and would rather play than sleep from 4-5am.

The night before last Stefin and I were both exhausted (unbelievable, I know).  He and Aeli went on a walk to Mardi Gras Mart at nine, and I was in bed by the time they got back.  Stefin went in the next room to put the babe to sleep.

I dozed off, then awoke to Aeli peering over the edge of our bed.  No papa in sight.

"Doooh!  Boooo!" he said.

I called for Stefin.

Once, twice, three times, a-loudly.

No answer.

Finally I picked up my phone and dialed Stefin.

"Hello?"  he answered groggily.

He had fallen asleep on Aeli's floor.

It's nice that Aeli crawled back into our room rather than straight into the "forbidden bathroom," that houses Huck's litter box and a low shelf of my makeup.

Silly bear.